Besides working on my Iran book, I’m also getting ready for my “Social Networking Tour.” Hopefully it will take place in the next week.
How does it work? Not really sure, but according to Penny Sansevieri at Author Marketing Experts, Inc., I should end up with a bazillion people hitting my website and blog.
How much is a bazillion? Not sure, but I like the sound of it. Okay, maybe not a bazillion, but hopefully many more than I have now. People who’ve never heard of my book: A Broad Abroad in Thailand will now see it on the internet, along with my work in progress, A Broad Abroad in Iran.
Getting your name out there is the biggie. Sitting in your office and hoping that Oprah is dialing 411 at this very minute and asking for your phone number is a great dream, but you have to do more.
It’s tough out there. I keep reading about all those wonderful writers who’ve made it to the big-time publishers, and wonder if it will ever happen. I sent out a wonderful query the other day and just knew the agent would be so eager to represent me that she’d call me the second she read it. Well, there must be a reason. She’s probably on a short vacation, or maybe ill in a hospital somewhere and no one is reading her e-mails. That’s it. So, I'll just wait until she returns from her vacation or recovers from the flu, or whatever. But I will not think negative thoughts. Nosiree! She’ll call. How could she not? The book’s a hoot, even one of her clients agreed.
Here’s one of the problems: it’s self-published. Why agents don’t want to go after these books is beyond me. If you have a good selling record I’d think they’d say, Hey, let me see the book, maybe we have a best-seller here! Then again, I guess they think if you self-published that you’ve been turned down by other agents. Well, maybe they need to realize that we all can’t wait the four years it takes to get the book out. I don’t have that long. I don’t even buy green bananas anymore. So, come on, agents. Lighten up!
But just in case your phone does ring, make sure you answer with your most professional voice. You never know, it could be Oprah! Whoops, have to go. The phone’s ringing.
Showing posts with label marketing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label marketing. Show all posts
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Sunday, March 9, 2008
BOOK PROMOTION 101 - From the Stakeout to the Kill (Or: Secrets from a Self-Promoting Slut)
Okay, here’s the deal. We have to promote ourselves! There’s only one person who knows the book and thinks it’s the Greatest Story Ever Told; and that person is the author. I have no shame when it comes to promoting, selling or getting in someone’s face (or dinner plate) to sell my book.
The first thing I did after my cover was designed was to design and make a bookmark. It was easy. All I had to do was set my margins on my word document to the size of a normal bookmark (2”x7”) and then start typing….In this laugh-out-loud memoir, Dodie Cross…yada, yada, yada. You’d a thought I had just been awarded the Pulitzer by the way I bragged. But, why not? Whose going to walk up to you and say: “Hey, I read your book, and it wasn’t a ‘Laugh out loud.’”
Next I called around and got some quotes on 500 bookmarks; some prices were higher than my mortgage payment, some companies took six weeks to deliver. Then I found Office Depot. They were fast, did the work in-house, and the bookmarks turned out lovely! Then I began my attack:
The Stakeout: Every time I left the house I made sure I had at least 50 bookmarks stuffed into my purse. The second I saw a straggler, a woman sitting alone, two or more women together, or husband and wife, I began reaching into my purse. “Hi,” I’d say, giving my best local author smile, “I’m a local author and this is a bookmark for you.” “Oh, thanks,” most would mutter as they haltingly accepted it, hoping I wasn’t a rabid cult member trying to lure them into my church.
The Assault: I can’t tell you how many times my cheapo little cards sold a book for me. In restaurants: I’d scope out the room looking for happy faces—crinkles around the eyes shows a propensity for laughing; women chattering over a glass of wine (I always approach drinkers, they’re happy people). I’ve left the restaurant with two people trailing me to my car for an on-the-spot purchase. I suspect it might have looked like some sort of a drug-buy, but hey, you’ve got to market at any cost!
* On airplanes: I walk the aisles looking for women reading. They’re easy prey. “Hi,” I say brightly as I check out the name of the book they’re reading. “You look like you’d enjoy this type of book,” as I insert a bookmark into their book. There’s really no way to avoid a sales pitch on a plane. Where are they gonna go to get away from you?
* At the post office: Lines of women, just waiting to get their minds off of the dreary duty of picking up “held” bills. I think they’re the easiest marks. They have no book with them; they are bored beyond endurance; and their eyes light up when I tell them that the back of my bookmark is “for women only.” Then I lurk just outside the door, knowing I’ve interested a few of them, and sure enough, I have captured at least one to three bored housewives longing for some excitement in their lives, and honey, I tell them, this book will do it. Once I ran out of bookmarks before the line of women ran out, and I actually had a lady look ticked off. “Where’s mine?” she asked.
* Doctor’s offices: Another sure-fire captive audience. They’re all reading; either books or magazines left over from the pterodactyl period or boring health leaflets. “Hi,” I say, giving them the “local author” bit, “I’ll bet this book might be more interesting than reading about the heartbreak of seborrhea and psoriasis.”
Coming in for the Kill—The Guarantee: “This is a woman’s book,” I tell them. “Very funny, fast reading, and if you don’t laugh out loud I’ll refund your money.” “Oh!” some would reply, suddenly interested. “Well, gee. Okay. Um, where can I get it?” they’d ask while turning the card over and reading the hilarious synopsis I devised to trap such hold-outs. “Well, if you’re interested in saving some money in shipping and handling costs, I have copies in my car for just your type of smart shopper. Plus, I can autograph it for you if you purchase it right now.” I do believe I have sold more from my trunk than from my website.
I guess what I’m trying to say with all this airy persiflage is: don’t be a bunch of nattering nabobs of negativism. Get out and be a self-promoting slut!
The first thing I did after my cover was designed was to design and make a bookmark. It was easy. All I had to do was set my margins on my word document to the size of a normal bookmark (2”x7”) and then start typing….In this laugh-out-loud memoir, Dodie Cross…yada, yada, yada. You’d a thought I had just been awarded the Pulitzer by the way I bragged. But, why not? Whose going to walk up to you and say: “Hey, I read your book, and it wasn’t a ‘Laugh out loud.’”
Next I called around and got some quotes on 500 bookmarks; some prices were higher than my mortgage payment, some companies took six weeks to deliver. Then I found Office Depot. They were fast, did the work in-house, and the bookmarks turned out lovely! Then I began my attack:
The Stakeout: Every time I left the house I made sure I had at least 50 bookmarks stuffed into my purse. The second I saw a straggler, a woman sitting alone, two or more women together, or husband and wife, I began reaching into my purse. “Hi,” I’d say, giving my best local author smile, “I’m a local author and this is a bookmark for you.” “Oh, thanks,” most would mutter as they haltingly accepted it, hoping I wasn’t a rabid cult member trying to lure them into my church.
The Assault: I can’t tell you how many times my cheapo little cards sold a book for me. In restaurants: I’d scope out the room looking for happy faces—crinkles around the eyes shows a propensity for laughing; women chattering over a glass of wine (I always approach drinkers, they’re happy people). I’ve left the restaurant with two people trailing me to my car for an on-the-spot purchase. I suspect it might have looked like some sort of a drug-buy, but hey, you’ve got to market at any cost!
* On airplanes: I walk the aisles looking for women reading. They’re easy prey. “Hi,” I say brightly as I check out the name of the book they’re reading. “You look like you’d enjoy this type of book,” as I insert a bookmark into their book. There’s really no way to avoid a sales pitch on a plane. Where are they gonna go to get away from you?
* At the post office: Lines of women, just waiting to get their minds off of the dreary duty of picking up “held” bills. I think they’re the easiest marks. They have no book with them; they are bored beyond endurance; and their eyes light up when I tell them that the back of my bookmark is “for women only.” Then I lurk just outside the door, knowing I’ve interested a few of them, and sure enough, I have captured at least one to three bored housewives longing for some excitement in their lives, and honey, I tell them, this book will do it. Once I ran out of bookmarks before the line of women ran out, and I actually had a lady look ticked off. “Where’s mine?” she asked.
* Doctor’s offices: Another sure-fire captive audience. They’re all reading; either books or magazines left over from the pterodactyl period or boring health leaflets. “Hi,” I say, giving them the “local author” bit, “I’ll bet this book might be more interesting than reading about the heartbreak of seborrhea and psoriasis.”
Coming in for the Kill—The Guarantee: “This is a woman’s book,” I tell them. “Very funny, fast reading, and if you don’t laugh out loud I’ll refund your money.” “Oh!” some would reply, suddenly interested. “Well, gee. Okay. Um, where can I get it?” they’d ask while turning the card over and reading the hilarious synopsis I devised to trap such hold-outs. “Well, if you’re interested in saving some money in shipping and handling costs, I have copies in my car for just your type of smart shopper. Plus, I can autograph it for you if you purchase it right now.” I do believe I have sold more from my trunk than from my website.
I guess what I’m trying to say with all this airy persiflage is: don’t be a bunch of nattering nabobs of negativism. Get out and be a self-promoting slut!
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Shakespeare's "To be or not to be" had everything to do with marketing and distributing!
I've just had a eureka-moment! You can write the best book in the world, but if you don't put some blood, sweat and tears behind it, it will sit quietly in the dark recesses of someone's storage area; all the while you're paying $125.00 a month to keep it there, nice and snuggly and dusty.
Ah, marketing and distribution! I read this truism somewhere: You've written a book. You think your work is done! HA! Now you have to market and distribute the book. Good luck! Your work has just begun.
As a self-published author, you're on your own, kiddo! No one there to take your hand, lead you in the right direction, warn you of the pitfalls and pratfalls. Nope, just you and your little fingers on the keyboard, searching for distributors to answer your queries: "Oh! Absolutely! Mail the copy of your book to me at once. We have been looking for a book of your caliber. You should make millions from this..."
But alas, all you find are companies that say: "How many books have you written?"
"Ahh, just this one, but I have another in the making."
"What are your marketing strategies?"
"Ahh, well, ah, I've hired a publicist, but they're so expensive I could only get them for six weeks."
"Hmmm. Well, we really only take on TRIED AND TRUE authors, so maybe you need to find another company."
"Well, can you recommend any?"
"No. Good day."
So, you slam down the phone, blow your nose, wipe your eyes then look for the next phone number. You find a couple, but when you hear their cost to "distribute" your book, you realize it could cost you more money then the publicist, and twice the cost of your printing.
Do these distributors have it in with the Big-4 printing companies? It's scary how they seem to all hang together; Hey, let's not let the little guy in. If he thinks he can do it without us, then let him try. We'll railroad him at every turn.
Then you find a list of distributors who say they'll take on a one-book publisher. But, hey, wait a minute. They require the deed to your house and cars before signing you on.
Okay, if any nice-guy distributors are out there reading this, HELP! I need you. Give a kid a break. When I'm wealthy and at the top of the New York Times Best Sellers List I'll tell the world how you gave me my first real break in the distribution world.
Ah, marketing and distribution! I read this truism somewhere: You've written a book. You think your work is done! HA! Now you have to market and distribute the book. Good luck! Your work has just begun.
As a self-published author, you're on your own, kiddo! No one there to take your hand, lead you in the right direction, warn you of the pitfalls and pratfalls. Nope, just you and your little fingers on the keyboard, searching for distributors to answer your queries: "Oh! Absolutely! Mail the copy of your book to me at once. We have been looking for a book of your caliber. You should make millions from this..."
But alas, all you find are companies that say: "How many books have you written?"
"Ahh, just this one, but I have another in the making."
"What are your marketing strategies?"
"Ahh, well, ah, I've hired a publicist, but they're so expensive I could only get them for six weeks."
"Hmmm. Well, we really only take on TRIED AND TRUE authors, so maybe you need to find another company."
"Well, can you recommend any?"
"No. Good day."
So, you slam down the phone, blow your nose, wipe your eyes then look for the next phone number. You find a couple, but when you hear their cost to "distribute" your book, you realize it could cost you more money then the publicist, and twice the cost of your printing.
Do these distributors have it in with the Big-4 printing companies? It's scary how they seem to all hang together; Hey, let's not let the little guy in. If he thinks he can do it without us, then let him try. We'll railroad him at every turn.
Then you find a list of distributors who say they'll take on a one-book publisher. But, hey, wait a minute. They require the deed to your house and cars before signing you on.
Okay, if any nice-guy distributors are out there reading this, HELP! I need you. Give a kid a break. When I'm wealthy and at the top of the New York Times Best Sellers List I'll tell the world how you gave me my first real break in the distribution world.
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